Monday 9 June 2008

Can a guy and a girl ever be just friends?

I know this question has been raised many times before tonight, but I wanna talk about my own situation. This won't be written just to soothe Cristina, but also because it's something I've been thinking about. ;)

STUDY CASE:

We take Livia, 5 years old, moves to another neighbourhood with older brother, parents and grandmother. Since the building they are moving in is a new one, there are many other families in the same situation. This is where we find Bobo, 6 years old, moving in with older brother, parents and being looked after by grandmother. We know that at these young ages girls and boys are not really interested in each other unless they both like to play hide-and-seek or Monopoly. But since the grandmothers are in the same situation (i.e. looking after grandkids), they start talking to each other and exchanging experiences on raising the little brats. Oh, forgot to mention that our characters' apartments are identical, just on two different consecutive floors.

School begins for Livia, while Bobo had already started the previous year. Although they are good friends when home, at school or at the playground Bobo likes to embarrass Livia just to make himself look good. This lasts until he turns 18 and gets a really cute dog called Mark, so he doesn't need being cruel to Livia to impress people (i.e. girls!) anymore. They spend a lot of time together, mostly because Bobo and his older brother are more of siblings to her than her own brother ever was... or will be! Also, they are cool! They had the first VCR in the building! Imagine that! Got to learn "Rambo" and "Rocky" by heart. Saw "Pretty Woman" like 40 times. What could ever beat that? They also had amazing candy all the time! Well, food in general... Food always tastes better at someone else's place, haven't you noticed? Unless it's one of those facilities where you are locked away to lose 100 kilos... :P

Years pass... Highschool ends... Unfortunately for Livia, she had to finish the last, being the youngest. If on the first year there was Seby (Bobo's older brother) who was cool because he was on the basketball team (Livia felt important because she knew him and he would say "hello" to her in front of other people!), on the rest of the years there was Bobo. I don't think there's anyone who went to that highschool back then who didn't know Bobo! He was such a star... or show-off! And yes, he'd say "hello" too. She was kind of a dork (meaning she was shy, fat, wore glasses, learnt pretty well and some of the teachers liked her), therefore she wasn't part of the cool kids' group. That is why it meant the world to her when both brothers weren't ashamed to admit that they knew her. It became even better when they started... or was it just Bobo back then?... they started calling her their "sister". *shivers with pleasure* :))

After highschool, they spent so much time together that when the first of the brothers married, it was kind of weird to put a stop to the endless hours spent watching movies, playing computer games or just goofing around.

I always found it weird that Bobo, despite his popularity, never became a jerk. I know he's not perfect, who the hell is? But he's the kind of person that you can always... and I mean ALWAYS... count on! Sometimes I wonder how he is not more selfish. You ask him for something and you actually expect he is going to turn you down, but he just says yes! He has the loveliest soul ever and Livia loves him for that.

A bit later in the story, Bobo met Cristina. I'm not 100% sure that Livia liked her from the beginning, but not because there was something wrong with Cristina, but because Livia was just over-protective with Bobo. Did any girl think they could just come along and take her brother away? Hmm, she had to pass some tests (in Livia's mind, of course!). Military drill? Piece of cake when compared to the checklist of things to accomplish in Livia's mind. More like in Livia's soul... :) Cristina gracefully managed to convince Livia that she was right for her childhood friend, especially because she was (still is) intelligent enough to understand the kind of friendship that her husband (yes, they got married!) had with this girl called Livia. She understood that she didn't have any reason to be jealous or paranoid because Bobo and Livia were strictly friends. No, brother and sister!

So when Livia (endlessly single) had to attend another childhood friend's wedding somewhere in the country, Cristina didn't have anything against Bobo accompanying her. Coz yes, Bobo was that nice again as to offer to go along with her.

This is why, last Saturday, early in the morning, Livia was picking Bobo up from his home, saying goodbye to wife and baby, promising to be back soon. And the wife actually had a genuine smile on her face and not a fake smirk saying "I don't like this one bit!". They drove away, arrived to their destination, went to the wedding together, came back to the bed & breakfast they stayed at, shared the same bed, never touched (or even thought of touching for a second), Livia endured Bobo's snoring, not sure if Bobo had to endure Livia's snoring, woke up early in the morning, packed and drove back to Bucharest, where Livia delivered Bobo to his wife and son in one piece and with very clean consciences. If Bobo hadn't go with her, Livia would have gone up the wall with boredom. He was funny, polite, brought three shirts and three ties along for her to choose what suited what she was wearing, socialised, drove on the worst bits of the road, encouraged her to get over her driving fears, stopped and waited patiently for her to take photos of mountains and of fields of poppy flowers. He was just great.

Guess what I'm trying to say is that for me, the story I have just told you proves that yes, a guy and a girl CAN be only friends, quite easily actually.

END OF CASE STUDY

To make this more interesting, I'll add some pictures that Livia and Bobo took this last weekend. Enjoy! ;)

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, yes, they can!
I'll always believe this!

Anonymous said...

Technically they can, but 99.99% cases one of them will change at least one of their friendship rules by seeing the other one like more then just a friend....
Been there, done that!

shamrockraver said...

Well, of course, sometimes you may see a friend a bit more than "just a friend", but it depends from case to case and on the conditions the friendship is set in (i.e. one of them is married, one of them has a girlfriend/boyfriend etc.). I was also trying to make another point: not all wives are hysterical when it comes to the female friends of their husbands. ;)

PS-Who have you been there and done that with? :P

Anonymous said...

I thought i knew....
I was talking about Savina....
In short: good friends for half an year, then best friends, then i kind of felt attracted to her, but she didn't felt the same way....She like me, cared about me but that's it. I coudn't have a relationship with her...i almost lost my friends...
"Tot raul spre bine", now i'm as happy as i can be with my true love.
How does my long story told short sound?
Ring a bell?

PS - for those who are wondering, we (still) are old friends (i hope).

Kisses!

shamrockraver said...

I can only say I'm happy for you. :) All things have a meaning even if we don't see it when they actually happen to us.

Ever knew you were my reason to lose weight? In a way... More like the reason that kicked my ass and got me started! Thank God for that! :P

Anonymous said...

"Ever knew you were my reason...More like the reason that kicked my ass and got me started!"
Can u be more specific? Or we'll talk someother time?

I am happy for you too and you must konw that i was and i still am very proud of what you achieved and i'm giving you as an exemple every time i get the chance.
So you go girl!
I'm trully sorry that we couldn't speak as often as we did in the old days, but as you told everybody, our "headquarters" is now populated with happy couples and little children...God bless them!
Maybe we will get together soon!
All the best,
always POPIKA!

shamrockraver said...

We'll talk some other time... ;)